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An altruist’s edge

In my coaching practice, I often work with people who are altruists, who are also fantastically good at bringing people together. They are the queens and kings of party-throwing. They plan beautiful projects with dozens of people involved. They see these projects through till the end. And they sacrifice some of their own well-being for the sake of being of service to others. They see where our human society lacks justice, beauty and peace, and then they work hard to literally make this world a better place. They get things done. And they are over-worked and under-nourished when it comes to their heart’s deeper needs and desires.

If this is you, here’s an edge you are carrying around, probably without knowing it: You have such a deep longing for being with other people that you create elaborate experiences for others just so you can connect with with them – at the expense of your own time and energy.

The mere act of bringing people together – by inviting a diverse team of professionals to join you for a new project you just plucked out of your highly creative brain, or by having your friends come sit around your kitchen table at brunch – is highly fulfilling for you.

But the thought that you could connect with others “without a purpose” is probably deeply uncomfortable for you.

Imagine you would meet with someone just to spend time with them.

To have coffee with a friend, with no other agenda than to chat for a while and to feel well in each other’s presence.

And to then not invite that friend over to your place.

To then also not pay for a whole party and invite all of your other friends, too.

To just say to someone: “Hey, I would love to see you. Are you free on Friday?”

And to not have this coffee date be about anything else but connection.

If you are feeling a psychological edge when you imagine going there: Good. Play with that edge. Feel its shape and size, and sense where this experience starts making you feel uncomfortable: As soon as you imagine calling your friend? When you imagine that there’s no deeper meaning behind that date, that you would just like to spend time with them? When you imagine that you won’t be paying for your friend’s coffee, only for the one you are going to have, yourself?

Sense where you have a tendency to over-give, and where you feel uncomfortable around receiving the gift of spending time with someone you love.

And then call your friend anyway.

Let this be awkward.

You are trying something new.

How to get centered and grounded

If you’ve spent a bit of time in the personal development world online, you may have noticed certain buzzwords:

“Centered”, for example.

“Grounded”.

“Aligned”.

“Tuned in”.

For me as an energy worker, all of those terms describe very specific states of being, and they mean very specific processes that I use in all of my Sessions. I’m not so sure if everyone who uses those words online uses them in the same way I do, though. So I thought I’d do a bit of disambiguation work today. Clarify two of those terms out there: “centered”, and “grounded”. And share one of my techniques to help you actually get centered, and get grounded.

Why? Because these two states of being are at the heart of every type of personal development. If you know how to get centered and grounded, you know how to pull yourself into yourself when things are chaotic around you, and you create an opening that lets you access your intuitive wisdom, even when your mind is spinning.

So here goes.

To “be centered”, in my vocabulary, means to clearly experience – and to be in inner conversation with – the essence of your soul, and to somatically feel that you are connected to your eternal self by an energetic stream (aka your “line of light”) that is flowing down to you, coming straight from the center of your soul.

To “be grounded”, in my book, means to have an awareness and a felt sense of the physical experience of living in a human body, and to be able to follow your subtle sensory link to the living organism that gives you life: Earth.

So when I say “to be centered and grounded”, what I mean is that you can sense a pulse, or an energetic stream, flowing through you, alternating between two poles: Your soul above, and the Earth below you. It means to me that you feel safe knowing that you are an eternal being in a physical body, and that you are fully aware of your existence, right here, right now.

Let’s get practical:

There is one specific technique to help you get centered and grounded that uses two chakras located outside of your physical body: Your 9th and your 10th chakras.

The 9th chakra, also known as the “seat of the soul”, is located above your crown.

The 10th chakra, also referred to as the “earth connection”, is located just below you, in the ground.

To me, those two chakras are representatives of your soul and the Earth. Like pocket sized versions of the two, perfectly placed if you want to safely center and ground yourself, using these two chakras as your two poles, above and below.

Try this

Sit down comfortably. If you can, keep your spine nice and tall.

Breathe.

Become aware of those small movements your body naturally makes as you inhale and exhale.

Now, bring your attention inwards, as if you were looking at your heart, and with your inner senses, follow that energetic stream (aka your line of light) that runs from the back of your heart down your spine, into the earth, and into your 10th chakra, below you.

Sense the dense energy, the compactness, the earthiness of that chakra.

Then, follow the energetic stream as it travels back up again, back into your body, up your spine, up and out your crown, and into your 9th chakra, above you.

Sense the shiny quality and the bright light of that chakra.

Keep your awareness on your line of light and sense-see-feel that pulsating loop of energy as it runs up and down between your earth connection below (your 10th chakra), your body in the middle, and the seat of your soul above (your 9th chakra).

Feel that pulse, that flow, that stream, that line of light, as it flows up and down, in an endless loop.

Get a felt sense of your connectedness to both poles, below and above: To your your earthiness below your feet, and to your shininess in the seat of your soul.

Hold your awareness on that pulsating energetic stream for as long as feels comfortable.

What do you notice?

To close, bring your awareness back into your heart, gently focus on the way your body is breathing, feel your feet on the ground, wiggle your toes, and come back to your here and now.

Edited to add: If you’d like to have me guide you through a similar meditation, have a look at this post. Enjoy!

The Love-Trust-Respect Triangle

“Imagine a world where your closest relationships are built on Love-Trust-Respect. Now compare that world to your current reality. What do you see?” – #InnerWisdomSystem

In my work, I often come across an energetic triangle of love, trust and respect. It seems to build a solid foundation for our most precious relationships, and when one of its three building blocks is missing, things tend to feel a bit… wonky.

For example, if you are in a friendship where love is missing, you probably feel like you’re constantly negotiating business deals. Here’s what that could look like: Person C: “If you do X for me, I will do Y for you.” – Person D: “Ok, but only if you promise you won’t do Z in front of everybody.” Exhausting, no?

If you are in a romantic relationship where you don’t trust your partner, you might be suspicious of their motives. Imagine this dialogue: Person A: “Why would you go to that gig without me?” – Person B: “Why would you want to come? You don’t even like that kind of music.” A lack of trust creates this kind of tension. Deep trust would make A and B celebrate their differences.

If you are in a relationship that lacks respect, you won’t see one another clearly, and repeated anger patterns can become part of your conversations. An (exaggerated) version of this could sound like this: Person E: “I love you, I trust you, but really, I think you should be doing something else with your life.” – Person F: “Oh really? Look who’s talking! Like you were only ever happy in your career?!?” Respect sounds different.

Have a look at your closest personal relationships. Are the energies of love, trust and respect all present there? Can you sense that all three would like to support you?

How would you like to increase your capacity for love, trust and respect – within yourself, first, and then, also, within your various relationships?

Your soul has an inner structure

Just as a dry little seed holds the full DNA of a flower, your soul’s innate structure holds all the information on who you are.

A flower’s DNA holds information on how its plant will react to floods or droughts, how it will play with bees and other pollinators, how it will copy its inner system and create new generations of plants, and so on.

It’s a very neutral process of growth, bloom, death and rebirth that plays out every day, right outside our windows.

Similarly, your soul’s inner structure knows who you are.

Its inner wisdom knows how you will react to the societal challenges you grow up in, how you will move through joyful or traumatic experiences, how you will connect with souls that are compatible to yours, how you will give birth to new ideas, etc.

In order to make sense of your soul’s structure, what’s required of you is to learn how to tune in, connect to your soul and download its wisdom. Your body is aware of that wisdom, your heart is, too, but your mind may have its doubts about the details.

And since we live in a very brain-focused world, your mind needs to be made conscious of certain truths within you for you to be able to actively live as yourself.

Try this:

Get yourself into a centered, meditative state and bring your awareness into your line of light, as it flows up and down your spine, down to the heart of earth, and up to the center of your soul, in a never-ending loop.

Once you’re tuned into that line of light, ask your #innerwisdomsystem to send you an energetic image of your soul’s original structure, and receive it through your mind’s eye.

Meditate on that image.

See if you can make out your soul’s colours and inner workings.

Watch how it reacts when other souls are in its vicinity.

Ask your soul some simple questions and fine-tune your inner senses to receive its answers.

What do you notice?

To close, gently focus on the way your body is breathing, feel your feet on the ground, wiggle your toes, and come back to your here and now.

Image:
One of my Symmetric Light Series pieces: Green lichen growing on an old piece of pink concrete
©️ Lilly Mackuth, 2018

Your intuition doesn’t scream

“Your intuition doesn’t scream. It’s a quiet voice, ruled by common sense and a bit of magic. It won’t make any decisions for you. But it will gladly support your intentions.” – Me, when someone expects their #InnerWisdomSystem to do all the work for them.

You are equipped with a very precise, custom-made inner guidance system that is directly linked to the wisdom of your personal soul.

AND you have free will.

Please use them both.

Time and space are irrelevant.

Energy Work works across time and space.

You can send forgiveness across generations.

You can send healing energies back through time and help your past lives find peace. (Which, in turn, will make your present self feel better.)

You can receive detailed visions from your future self and see who you could become.

You can tune into the energetics of your relationships and let your inner senses show you how to heal and transform those connections.

Your consciousness can do all of that for you. And more.

Contact me if that sounds interesting.

How to love your differences

There’s a common problem that runs through many (love) relationships: That two people, who are very different from each other, feel stressed by being so different from each other.

Let’s say one of them is very spontaneous, has a thousand ideas, and wants to make every idea a reality, right away – no matter what.

And let’s say their partner is very calm and methodical, likes to plan ahead, and loves to apply their know-how in a very rational, diligent manner.

The problem starts when both of them try to adapt to each other. Person one will feel bad about their ideas, thinking they’re “too spontaneous”, and person two will feel like “the boring one” who constantly “overthinks things”.

The result: They both stop being there for each other, and they both feel like they’re not sexy enough for their partner.

Energetically, there’s a beautiful, elegant solution to this problem.

When you meditatively let yourself drop into the four mystical chambers of your heart, you can get a very direct, embodied experience of how you would really like to play, in your relationships.

(And I don’t mean your sex life – although your heart may give you some very detailed pieces of information about that part, too.)

Energetically, your heart can bring you to a place where you can be you, in a very relaxed way – and where you can keep being yourself, no matter who you’re with.

That’s because your heart deeply supports your individuality, and it can help you embody your individuality, fully.

Which means that once you have gone through this process inside your heart, your partner will experience you just the way you are. In all your glory.

Spoiler alert: You’re going to love being yourself.

If that sounds like something you would like to try:

My new Heart Truth program still has a couple of spots available, so if you would like to

  • get direct access to your inner truth
  • gain deep insights into the four big themes of your heart: Love, Wisdom, Strength and Vision
  • experience profound healing and transformation in these areas of your life
  • learn to love your individuality
  • and lay a foundation for being your own guide in these chaotic times,

my program might be for you.

Registration closes May 15, 2018* (the day after tomorrow).

Here are all the details.

And if you are interested, contact me here. We will start with a non-binding Intro Consultation via Zoom. (You won’t have to create your own account – all you need is a device that lets you do video conferences, e.g. your smart phone or a laptop that has a camera and a microphone.)

I look forward to our first conversation!

New: The Heart Truth Process

It’s launch day!

My new one-on-one coaching program is ready for you! Click here for a short intro video, if you like.

My program, “The Heart Truth Process”, is designed for you to gain direct access to one particular part of your #innerwisdomsystem: Your heart.

Energetically speaking, its four chambers represent four big themes in your life: Love (both romantic and platonic), your Applied Wisdom, your True Strength and the Big Vision of your life.

And the goal of my program is to help you tune into these four chambers and let your heart be your guide when it comes to these four big themes in your life.

So, if that resonates with you, have a look at my new Heart Truths page.

The first 6 one-on-one spots are available for May and June – but before you make a decision, let’s meet for a free, non-binding Intro Conversation where we can get to know each other and you can ask me anything about the program.

All you’ll need for that is a device that lets you do video conferences, i.e. your laptop or a smart phone.

Looking forward to our first conversation!

Love is not governed by the mind

The four subtle chambers of your heart hold deep wisdom for you. They also hold the patterns of your current relationship with love. And they know which energy medicine is needed in order for you to compassionately heal your relationship with love.

Hardly anyone of us grew up in an environment that was infused with actual love.

And the patterns our ancestors laid out before us do not work for the times we are living in.

Love is not governed by the mind, and yet, our minds often try to convince us that there must be a reasonable step-by-step guide that we can follow to be in love, and that there surely is such a thing as a “proven method” for us to master this game, once and for all.

The heart knows another way. It would like to take you inwards and lead you on a much more subtle journey, on a much more mystical ride than the mind would like love to be. The mind’s tools do not work in this realm.

To love and be loved means to let your heart lead you. And it means to be in true relationship with yourself, with the ones you want to spend your time with, and with the world as such – as brutal as it is, sometimes.

Contact me if you’d be interested in exploring the four mystical chambers of your heart and go on this ancient healing journey with me. I would be honoured to serve you in this way.

Truth feels like Relief

One of the biggest AHA moments many of my clients get when they start working with me is that truth feels like relief – even if it seems painful, at first.

There’s a complex mental avoidance mechanism going on when we do not want to see the full truth of a situation, which can create chronic stress symptoms – for example when we want to avoid addressing trauma or adverse childhood experiences. This avoidance mechanism is a protection process that tries to keep our assumptions about life as unchanging as possible, because this part of us is trying to keep us “safe”.

However, addressing the truth about what really happened, or the truth about how life really is, instead of sugarcoating it, actually feels like a relief.

And yet, because we are trained to avoid certain truths, we are afraid of what might happen if these sugarcoated truths were revealed.

For example, in relationships, we often have a “gut feeling” about someone when we don’t fully trust them. And yet, since most of us were raised to be polite, we often choose not to go with that gut feeling, and to stay polite, instead.

So, we are trying to make things work with that person – to literally STAY, politely, instead of leaving – even though our body mirrors back to us that we do not trust them.

Allowing yourself to examine that intuitive body mirror will always reveal very valid reasons for why your body does not trust that person.

And revealing that truth is the relief your body aches for. It is the clarity of being able to let go of someone, even if, on paper, that someone might have been perfect.

Your body knows if they aren’t.

Trust that knowing.

If you need any help with deciphering the messages your body mirrors back at you, contact me for a free Intro Conversation. This is the work that I do.